Do You Need to Get Paid for Writing?

Email: richretyi@gmail.com

scrooge-mcduck-swimming-in-money

Do You Need to Get Paid for Writing?

If you’re a writer or an aspiring writer, it’s likely you heard a little bit about the scuttlebutt between The Atlantic and freelancer Nate Thayer. Thayer wrote a piece about Dennis Rodman going to North Korea to meet with Kim Jong Un. Someone from The Atlantic emailed him to ask if he’d be willing to adapt the piece, turning in 1,200 words by the end of the week. In return, The Atlantic offered no compensation, rather, they touted their audience of 13 million readers to which Mr. Thayer’s work would be exposed.

Thayer didn’t quite explode, but as a professional freelance writer, he didn’t find the deal very equitable. Earning a living as a writer, Thayer relies on writing gigs to “pay my bills and feed my children.” You can read Thayer’s take here and a few other opinions here and here. He didn’t quite find the exchange insulting, but more indicative of the state of publications and freelance writing in general.

I know you’ve been dying for my take on this. Lucky you.

I’m a very specific example of a freelance writer. I have a good-paying full-time job and I freelance more for fun than for the money. Yes, I’m compensated for the majority of the work I produce these days, but that wasn’t always the case. In a perfect world, I could survive on writing. Freelance, books, leaflets, whatever. But such is not the case right now, so I rut with a lot of editorial freedom and those publications pay me a fair wage (based on what The Atlantic is reporting) to deliver entertaining, readable copy on time and with as few or many poop references as the piece warrants.

My first piece of my writing to appear in print was a movie review for my college newspaper, The McGill Tribune. I reviewed Things to Do in Denver When You’re Dead. I paid for the ticket myself and I wasn’t compensated for my 200-word review which opened, “This movie is like a bad handjob…” My opening sentence was cut, but the editors, probably pressed for content, ran it anyway. This is how I started out.

I was unpaid through many more Tribune articles, then two years running a college humor magazine called The Red Herring. I graduated and stopped writing, until I switched careers, moved to Ann Arbor and met a girl named Jordan Miller. Jordan was the new lead blogger for AnnArbor.com and was recruiting community contributors who could offer free content on their new online platform. I hadn’t been published outside of work since college, so I jumped at the chance. My editors were lenient on the subjects I pitched, so I got to write about pretty much whatever I wanted whenever I wanted to. It was incredible experience and writing for an actual publication is great because you get immediate feedback. All for free.

I never asked to be paid, but my columns proved popular enough to lead my editors to request that I write more regularly in exchange for money. I took it. I wrote bi-weekly and a check arrived every month or so. It wasn’t much, but it was proof that I was an honest to goodness writer. I imagine stand-up comedians get a similar feeling when they actually get paid for telling jokes, or musicians actually getting paid to play music.

The AnnArbor.com exposure led to freelancing work with Concentrate Media and a few other smaller publications. They all started paying. Some wrote me personal checks for $8 features, some offered a lot more. I have trouble saying no in general, so when a new avenue offered to publish me and allowed me editorial freedom, I took it.

Until it all became too much. I started extending myself too much. Deadline after deadline loomed and I was working on multiple projects at once and this wasn’t even my real job. Plus, I was completely neglecting my own writing—fiction and non. So I stopped writing everywhere but Concentrate and AnnArbor.com and I stopped pursuing new publications.

Back to the point of this debate. Money vs. free. I’d gladly write for free in a publication I feel would elevate me to a new level. That means pretty much any magazine I respect, a Detroit newspaper and maybe even a popular blog or two (I wrote for Awesome Mitten this year for free, just because I felt like it). Platforms and publications are at an advantage with me because I need to write. I can’t help it. It might not seem that way with the infrequent additions I make to my blog, but it’s a compulsion. If I go a few days without writing, I feel out of sorts. It’s an odd feeling.

It offends my sensibilities when people who’ve never been published feel that they deserve to be paid for their work. That seems backasswards. Someone needs to prove themselves before they get compensated. Usually if you haven’t been published somewhere, it’s because you aren’t that good or you’re not trying hard enough. I don’t mean to overplay this, but it’s not that hard to get published somewhere if you’re a half-decent, reliable writer and you know how to use the Internet.

Those who’ve been paid for work, even once or twice, it’s more of a judgment call. It’s up to them if they feel the exposure or audience is worth the free labor. I took a 92% pay cut to write for iSPY Magazine because they’re a nice group of people and I’d never written for them before. I wrote for Sidetrack’s email newsletter a few times in exchange for gift cards (I only used one) because they asked nicely. Despite the pay gulf, I spent as much time on those pieces as I did my highest paying gigs. For me, it’s about product and process, and I find it fun to challenge myself for new audiences and try out new voices.

Mr. Thayer is beyond writing for gift cards. I get that. If I had to eat on the money I make writing, I would look so, so hot and skinny. Instead, the money I make from writing shows me that my editors appreciate my work and keeps me churning out (hopefully good) content despite working many hours at my real job.

And I hope it’s paying off. I hope all the writing I’ve done the last four years of freelancing has helped me work out some kinks and improve, both as a writer and a story generator. I’ve heard feedback from people close to me, a few of whom have independently mentioned that they noticed my writing getting significantly better sometime in the last year. I’ll take it. I don’t see the change, but I have textual dysmorphia.

What’s the point of this long winded post? Write for free until you get good, then start asking for money. Prove you’re worth something before you start holding out your hand. And if you’re good enough, someone will recognize it. I’m an optimist. And I’m happy to talk writing whenever you want to buy me a drink. Because talking is one thing I don’t do for free.

bartender

Jobs I’m Terrible at: Bartender

I had a dream last night that I was bartending for charity. I had a one-hour shift to try and raise as much money as possible for some unknown cause. I stepped up to the bar and took my first order: a rum punch bowl and a “Killers” beer. I grabbed one of three rum punch bowls, then started looking for straws. I couldn’t find any. I couldn’t find any rum. I searched blindly for Malibu. Then I went into the beer cooler. Did he say “Killers” or “Strohs”? I was too embarrassed to ask. Other bartenders were buzzing around me, serving drinks and I had no clue where anything was or what to do. Finally, everyone stopped moving. The crowd thinned out. The hour was up and my patron was kind of pissed. I apologized, then said, “I don’t think we have any Killers.” I’m a terrible bartender.

I’ve been a bartender twice in my life. Sort of. The first time was in college when, my junior and senior years, I was a barback every Thursday for the busiest night of the week at the campus bar (Gert’s). I served around 10 beers in two years, so “bartender” would be a stretch.

The second time I tended bar was for two nights in the spring of 2007 at Sidetrack in Ypsilanti. I was new to Ypsi, wanted to earn some extra money and meet some new people so what better occupation than part-time bartender? I think Mrs. French just really liked me in the interview. I admitted I wasn’t great at making drinks and had extremely limited experience but she started me on Cinco de Mayo. I showed up in a clean t-shirt and jeans, worked with a really nice experienced female bartender and mostly washed dishes and fetched things from the basement. I realized quickly that I didn’t know jack shit about making drinks.

I went to the library and took out a giant bag of books, then wrote up cheat sheets of popular drinks and shooters and studied on the bus for the next three or four days until my next shift, where I was paired with another experienced bartender, this guy a huge dick. Maybe it’s because it was clear I sucked at what I was doing or maybe it’s because the blender somehow stopped working when I was near it one time. In any event, this guy didn’t like me and I lasted five of the eight hours in my shift before he sent me home early. I was supposed to call to find out when my next shift was and I was politely told they wouldn’t be needing me. I could pick up my pay later in the week. It sucked but it was also merciful. I stunk and I was sick of studying drinks all day. Bartending just wasn’t my calling.

Since then, due to being slightly more of an alcoholic, I know a lot more about drinks and drinking. I’d probably make a much better bartender now. I might have made it to the Fourth of July.

boston bruins

I was the third-most famous person born in Welland, Ontario until tonight – thanks a lot Boston Bruins!

Welland, Ontario. The Rose City. Population: 50,331 in 2006. It’s most certainly shrunk since then since the steel factory and the pipe factory closed (yes, my hometown had a pipe factory). You may have heard of us because of the Welland canal, though chances are you haven’t. That’s okay.

The fact that Welland was such a sleepy, little town used to work to my advantage. Hard-scrabble back story, small-town hijinx and a halfway reasonable goal that I could reach before I hit 40 – to be the most famous person in the whole world from Welland, Ontario.

Think about it. What chance do any of you have of being the most famous person from your respective hometowns? Ann Arbor? Good luck! William Hewett of Hewlett-Packard, the founder of Domino’s. Members of The Stooges AND Taproot. Even Ypsilanti will give you a run for your money. You have a four-star general and some rock guy who dated Sandra Bullock.

Read more…

northern_illinois_huskies

My Slice of Northern Illinois

The Northern Illinois Huskies defeated Kent State in overtime of the MAC Championship game, thereby busting the BCS. The Huskies are headed to the Orange Bowl on January 1 to face the Florida State Seminoles. For those not fans of the MAC or degenerate gamble or both, this might have been the first time Northern Illinois blipped on their college football radar.

ESPN lists six players in the NFL today who attended NIU, and one is named Tracy. The big name is Michael Turner of the Atlanta Falcons. He’s a great running back and I almost got to work with him his senior season.

Step back to 2003 and meet Michael Turner The Burner. Senior running back for the Northern Illinois Huskies and darkhorse Heisman candidate, living life large in DeKalb, Illinois, an hour and 10 minutes west of Chicago in the heart of corn country. DeKalb isn’t known for much, and the city has the worst website I’ve seen in 10 years, but in 2003 for the football Huskies, the sun was shining and the skies were clear. And Richard Retyi, former sports information intern at Georgetown University, was in town looking for a job.

Read more…

There Are People a Lot Dumber Than You Who Do This Every Day

I’ve had the pleasure of working with some impressively intelligent people in my life. People with unique insights, creativity, the ability to articulate concepts I don’t have the power to explain and, above all, people who could  provide a sense of calm and context.

Our team recently put together an  ambitious idea for the coming year. Though I love the concepts and I’m confident the plan will be received with huge acclaim, we’re venturing into territory that isn’t in my wheelhouse. I’m tackling problems I’ve never tackled before. I’m stressed because for the first time in a while, I need to ask more questions than I have answers.

Read more…

writing

Writing Hiatus and the Return to Normal

It’s been brought to my attention that I’ve been writing a lot less lately. Blogs, freelance articles, tweets about poop (nope, got those covered) and trust me, I’ve noticed as well. Work has been busy. Video games plentiful. My couch so, so comfortable. Have you guys heard of this thing called Netflix. Holy crap, there’s a lot of stuff on there.

Times, they are a changing. After a season or two off, I’m ready to get back into regularly contributing to AnnArbor.com. I’m ready to jump back on the blogger train. I’m ready to ring in the final month and 21 days of the world.

If you care about such things, sorry for the layoff. I’ve let myself down, you down and my future biographers down. Back to normal. Hold on to your hats/toques.

social media disorder

I Need Ritalin, Or How Social Media is Altering My Brain

I need Ritalin. My brain isn’t working right. For the last few weeks, though it may have been the last month, or months, ugh – I’ve had trouble focusing on things. A general lack of focus. Flitting from one task to the other and one thought to the next. This new disorder isn’t memory-based. I know what I need to do and where I need to go (usually) but it’s the focus to tackle these specific tasks or listen to someone talk for five minutes that is testing my mental capabilities.

I always default to the three concussions I suffered in high school. I imagine growing patches of black on the MRI scans in my imagination as I age. More and more of the lobes being consumed by some mysterious cell-eating trauma from Notre Dame vs. Westlane football in 1993. We won. I got interviewed by the cable access TV crew at the game. I recall nothing at the time, other than watching it later at a friend’s house.

It might still be the concussions. But it’s more likely social media.

The most beautiful lakefront cottages you’ve ever seen will be built on the backs of medical, psychiatric and sociological studies related to social media, specifically the cognitive impact of the constant waterfall of information pouring into people’s brains. The majority of the population can take leisurely sips from the firehose  and aren’t required by job (and choice … let’s be clear here, I very much enjoy my job) to stare at the waterfall for eight-plus hours a day. Watching Twitter and Facebook feeds constantly cycling, staring at Excel documents and community management tools and sifting through piles of email and Google Alerts, I’m completing hundreds of tiny tasks each hour while rarely focusing on more than one or two bigger tasks each day. Social media is altering my brain.

I’m still capable of completing bigger and longer projects, but it takes a little more time to focus and a little more effort not to stray off task. And it makes it a whole lot harder to have to stop a project, do something else, and then jump right back in. My brain has re-wired. (Ed. note: During the writing and editing of this blog post I checked Twitter twice, looked at Tumblr and checked Instagram on my phone. I’m not kidding. This is a problem.)

I’ve never taken performance enhancing drugs for school (or sport, sadly – oh for a rematch of Notre Dame vs. Holy Cross in 1994) but I’ve heard great things about Ritalin and its ability to help people do really well on tests involving lots of math. I wonder what a shot or two (you inject it in your butt, right?) would do for me on a random Thursday. Would I be able to switch back and forth from quick tasks to deep-thinking big-idea to-dos with ease, or would I break something deep inside myself and never be quite the same. Maybe both!

For now I’m going to try and eat a little better, drink water and get more sleep. That’s about the best I can do for now. And not play any more high school football.

10k

The Toughest 10K in Michigan

Liz Smith called it the toughest 10K in Michigan. The Indian River Summerfest 10K. Eighty-five percent uphill, through rolling country roads and dirt trails ending in (historic?) Indian River. When plotting the Liz Smith Immemorial 10K, I had no intention of running an organized 10K. It’s not the $20 (though paying money to run seems absurd) but the idea of pitting myself in a contest of fitness against anyone. This is why I don’t try to race people in my Honda Civic or have push-up contests against men with large pectoral muscles. I don’t feel like setting myself up for failure.

Me and Rachel following the Indian River 10K. (Not pictured: my shame)

The field for the Indian River 10K was 40 deep. Broken into age categories, I was among the eight male competitors in their 30s to test their legs over 6.2 miles (it was actually closer to 6.4 according to a handy app I had on my phone, but who’s quibbling). The decision to run was a rash one, my preparation non-existent. Sure, I run two to three miles per gym visit and then do the elliptical, but that’s a lot different than running outdoors. Treadmill running is bouncing. Outdoor running is actual locomotion. Big difference.

I drank a free Monster energy drink (PLUG!), signed up for the 10K and immediately had some ice cream. Which I followed with a number of Miller Chills (PLUG!), a Budweiser (PLUG!) and hotdogs for dinner. I woke at 6:45am, drank two cups of coffee, ate a peanut butter sandwich and two more hot dogs. At 8am I queued up my running playlist and bounded down the backroads of Indian River (are there any other kind in Indian River) to the indifference of the cottagers walking down their front walks to grab the morning paper.

I started strong, my friends. I disrecall the songs I listened to for the first mile and a quarter, but the tunes, coupled with my hotdog strength, kept me below a 10-minute mile, keeping pace with Ms. Liz Smith. Her boyfriend Donnie was near the head of the 10K pack battling for an actual medal. He would finish in third place overall, averaging a 6:30 mile. That’s obscene. I don’t even want to get into it.

I stuck on Liz’s hip until the 10K and the 5K split off. The 10K went left and up a giant hill and the 5K split right, down a gentle slope, through a Wendy’s and a Dairy Queen and a full-service massage parlor. Liz pulled away from me and then the shin cramps started. It serves me right. I betrayed my body (beer, hotdogs, nail biting) so it struck back by making it impossible to plantar-flex my left foot. I sagged. People passed me. The pain increased but more than anything it was the inability to bend my foot that made me stop. And walk. At mile two.

I was angry. Like throw rocks into the woods angry (I didn’t actually do that, but I wanted to). I flexed my leg and watched one, then another person pass me and felt shame and embarrassment and little bit of fear. What if I had to walk the rest of the four miles on a bum leg? My time was climbing past 20 minutes and I knew that Donnie (showoff), Liz, Rachel (running the 5K) and her parents would be waiting for me at the finish line. And waiting. And waiting. A little kid and her dad passed me. I swatted at a fly buzzing around my head and slapped myself in the face.

I won’t drag this out. The shin relaxed. I started kicking back into gear and eventually I hunted down a grizzled woman a half-mile in front of me (it turned out she was 50+ – still, VICTORY!) and then I spotted the kid and her father. The little girl would run, then stop, run, then stop, while her dad chugged along at a slow pace, looking back to make sure his daughter didn’t wander into the woods or get hit by a jet ski on a trailer.

I zeroed in on the little girl. She was 10 years old cholesterol levels of an eight-year-old. Showoff x 2. I caught her on the final hill, then turned onto Main Street for the final 75 yards. I saw Rachel and her family and Donnie (not even sweating by now, psh!) and they were all cheering. I removed my headphones. I heard their happy, encouraging cries. Their cheers rang in my ears. For the little girl. The little girl gaining on me. Sprinting hard in her little running shoes and gaining on the tubby man from Canada. She crossed the finish a few steps in front of me to finish 37th overall. I took the popsicle stick with a 38 written on it (no microchips here) and high fived my little competitor. Maybe I threw the finish – maybe not. Atlantic City will never know. But her father will. SHE DIDN’T BEAT ME MR. CROFOOT! YOUR DAUGHTER IS THE 37th FASTEST 10K RUNNER IN INDIAN RIVER IN 2012. GOOD LUCK GETTING THAT CROSS-COUNTRY SCHOLARSHIP TO CENTRAL MICHIGAN NOW!

Other than a big blister on my foot, I was no worse for wear. My shin was relaxed, my nipples unbloodied and it wasn’t until the next day that my quadriceps felt the thousands of micro-tears I’d inflicted on them. I conquered the toughest 10K in Michigan and didn’t puke. And lost to a little girl. Allegedly.

Who wants to race in my Honda Civic? I’ve got nothing to lose.

calfs

The Little Things

The little things have gotten me to where I am today. For good and bad. The little things rule (rue?) my life. Or contribute to larger successes – it’s not all bad. My calf muscles: product of little things. When I was a high school freshman trying to gain muscle mass to compete in sports against all the kids older, more talented and physically more gifted than me, I frequented the school weight room. Well, a small portion of the school weight room.

It was a dingy, smelly, poorly lit hole in the ground accessible by a single door from the parking lot. In the deep recesses of the weight room were the real weights. The benches and the free weights and most of the things that would help me gain core strength and gridiron glory. Near the entrance was the calf machine.

The older students – 15, 16, 17, 18 and even 19 year-olds (this was Ontario during our now-defunct five-year high school program) – crowded the best machines, sweating and grunting and punching each other in the arm while throwing around casual homophobia. I didn’t dare venture amongst them. I stuck to the periphery. To the entrance. The calf machine.

I used that calf machine every trip to the weight room, which was a few times a week. Occasionally I got brave enough to do biceps curls. The little things built my calf muscles. Day after day, season after season. Today they are large and, though  not in their prime, still near-mint.

Positive little things. Green dots. Like my writing skill. See above for that example. Boom.

But the little things also sink me. Food. Productivity. Oral hygiene. Red dots. Like my fat ass and three pages of a novel I’ve been working on for three years.

A few weeks ago I committed myself to tackling the little things. Yoking them and making them drag me to victory. For every little thing I did right/well, I got a green dot. For every little thing I let slide or did poorly, I got a red dot. Spoiler alert – this lasted about two weeks. But I am more conscious of the little things now, even if I don’t use markers to prove it.

What little things do you do well? What little things slip through your fingers and cling to your thighs?

War_of_1812

How Canada Will Celebrate the 200th Anniversary of the War of 1812

Two hundred years ago, my country and my new country waged war. The motivations are lost to history (i.e. locked up in really old books stored in the places where homeless people go to charge their phones and use the bathroom) but from what little I remember from elementary school history:

  • The U.S. started it – invading Canada to expand her territory
  • The U.S. enlisted Irish “Fenians” to attack our flanks Canada repelled the assault, then looted and burned the White House
  • After withdrawing from your country victorious, Canada re-established its borders a few kilometers deeper into the United States because we could

All or most of those facts are probably inaccurate. Maybe grossly so. But that’s what I remember from my childhood schooling. Again, that might not be what we were taught, but that was my takeaway. Canada beat the USA. We burned the White House.

Here’s what Wikipedia tells me about the War of 1812. And, as we know, that’s as good as Britannica:

  • It’s the British, not Canada that fought the United States (semantics!)
  • It stemmed from trade restrictions and snorrrreeeeeeeeeeee
  • The War of 1812 inspired The Star Spangled Banner
  • Apparently the ship carrying all the booty from the looted White House sunk en route to Canada

My favorite quote on the war:

“Canada emerged from the war with a heightened sense of national feeling and solidarity, having repelled multiple American invasions. Battles such as the Battle of Queenston Heights and the Battle of Crysler’s Farm became iconic for English Canadians. In English Canada, especially Ontario, memory of the war has immense national significance, as the invasions were largely perceived by Canadians as an annexation attempt by America seeking to expand US territory. The war is scarcely remembered in Britain today.”

All this is moot. Canada has been looking forward to this bicentennial for two centennials! And we have the perfect stage on which to exact our righteous fury once again. The 2012 London Olympics.

Think about it. What country is supposed to walk away with the most medals from the most American of Olympics (the Winter Olympics can be dominated by Russians and Germans and Norwegians who ski and shoot bears all day). The Americans are getting so cocky that they let prize golden boy Micahel Phelps use Subway as his official calorie provider. Subway!? I eat Subway four times a week and look at me. Hell, look INSIDE me. Even less pretty. And if they treat their prized athlete like that, what kind of treatment do you think the steeplechasers are getting at the official training facility? Arby’s and Slurpees?

Canada wants this really bad. How bad? I’m finally at liberty to say that each and every Canadian Olympian went to the crossroads at midnight and sold his or her soul to the devil for Olympic glory. We’ve got a plane full of athletes with unparalelled powers fated to damnation coming to London to win every event from table tennis to Taekwondo. The next USA dream team in basketball – dream on. Wait until Rick Fox and company bring some Space Jam shit to the court.

How can you compete with the unholy power of Satan? The same way you can compete with a bunch of wronged Canadians (see British) marching on the White House after you rudely invaded southern Winnipeg with a brigade of Fenians.

America – gird yourself for a very crappy Olympics. And learn all the words to Oh Canada. It’s kind of a sweet song.